If you’ve ever stood with friends while someone passed around a vape, you’ve probably heard the same question I once did.
“Can I try?”
That’s usually how it starts. One curious puff from a friend’s sleek little device, the absence of ash, no lingering smell, just the sweet, fruity-smelling vapor – at least, that’s what I used to call it. Then, you convince yourself you’re not really smoking, it’s just something you do with friends.
Until, one day, you run out of your first pod.
And suddenly you’re angry, restless, you’re opening every drawer in your room hoping you missed one. Then you tell yourself the same thing everyone tells themselves– “It’s okay. I’ll just buy one last pod.”
The funny thing about the “last pod” is that it has a way of multiplying. One becomes ten. Ten becomes fifty. Before you know it, your “last pod” was a hundred pods ago.
Because underneath the fruity flavors and polished packaging, nicotine is still nicotine. It doesn’t matter how modern the device looks, whether it comes wrapped in tobacco leaves or aluminum and LED lights. The brain responds to nicotine the same way: by learning to crave it, expecting it, and eventually depending on it.
Across OECD countries, 14.8% of people aged 15 years and older smoked daily in 2023, while regular vaping doubled on average from 3% to 6% between 2016 and 2023. Tobacco use also contributed to an estimated 1.25 million adult deaths across OECD countries in 2022.
These numbers are meant to remind us that a simple act of “fitting in,” is part of a much larger story shaped by stress, addiction, marketing, or our very human tendency to believe that just one more won’t make a difference.
I know, because I lived it.
It was brutal. I was irritable; I couldn’t focus; I was hungry all the time; my brain felt wrapped in cotton; I was sleepy from morning until night; it felt like my life was in shambles. I wasn’t ready, but I convinced myself I didn’t have a choice. I just had to suck it up.
The first time I tried to quit, I lasted three miserable days. By the second day, I was irritable. By the third, I felt like I was getting sick. I couldn’t concentrate. I had headaches. And I coughed constantly. Everything annoyed me. It honestly felt like my body was protesting against me.
Eventually, I gave in.
One puff.
Then another.
Just like that, those three days disappeared, and I told myself I’d quit another time.
A year later, life gave me another chance.
I was preparing to fly to a country where vaping was banned (or so I thought). I figured I wouldn’t have access to it anyway, so I decided to quit. The day before my flight, I took one last hit, threw my sleek little device away, and told myself that was it.
It was brutal. I was irritable; I couldn’t focus; I was hungry all the time; my brain felt wrapped in cotton; I was sleepy from morning until night; it felt like my life was in shambles. Yes, I felt I wasn’t ready, but I convinced myself I didn’t have a choice. I just had to suck it up.
Then, on the second day of my trip, I saw people vaping.
As dramatic as it sounds, my heart sank.
For a brief moment, I actually considered buying one. I could have, nothing was stopping me anymore.
But that’s when I realized something – maybe the point was never that vaping was unavailable. Maybe the point was that I finally had an opportunity to choose differently. Nothing about it felt easy.
Illustration by Esma Melike Sezer on Unsplash
Sometimes I found myself instinctively reaching into my pocket, forgetting there wasn’t anything there anymore.
What I experienced wasn’t unusual. Nicotine withdrawal commonly causes irritability, anxiety, headaches, difficulty concentrating, restlessness, changes in appetite, and strong cravings. These symptoms aren’t signs that quitting isn’t working, they’re signs that the brain is adjusting to functioning without a substance it has learned to expect. The discomfort can be loud, but it is temporary.
In many ways, quitting feels like grieving. Not because you miss nicotine itself, but because you miss the hand reaching into your pocket; the excuse to step outside; the inhale after finishing a meal; the sweet dopamine kick on those stressful days. Breaking an addiction isn’t only about removing a chemical. It’s about rebuilding routines your brain had stitched together over years. That’s why experts often recommend identifying the situations that trigger vaping before the craving arrives. Replacing the ritual is just as important as resisting the nicotine itself. For people who began vaping to quit cigarettes, the UK’s National Health Service also recommends gradually reducing nicotine strength and vaping frequency, ideally with support from healthcare professionals or smoking cessation services, to improve the chances of long-term success.
Forcing myself to hate it never worked. Instead, I learned to acknowledge the cravings and accept that they might always linger, like an ex you never quite got over. Ironically, it was only after I stopped fighting the cravings that they gradually began to lose their hold on me.
It’s strange.
When I was vaping, I thought it improved my quality of life. Now, two weeks after quitting, I realize it was quietly taking far more than it ever gave back. The air feels cleaner; food tastes better; I feel more present instead of constantly waiting for my next puff; my wallet isn’t empty every few days because I need another pod; most importantly, I don’t feel like my day revolves around flavored vapor anymore.
The strange thing about preventable deaths is that they’re often prevented by ordinary decisions. Because quitting isn’t about becoming fearless or perfectly disciplined, it eventually becomes less about never wanting nicotine again and more about deciding which discomfort you’re willing to live with.
In the end, we all live with discomfort. The question is simply which discomfort we choose. The temporary discomfort of change. Or the lasting discomfort of dependence.
In the end, we all have to pick our poison.
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Editor’s Note
This article shares one person’s experience with nicotine dependence and quitting vaping. Individual experiences vary. If you are struggling with nicotine addiction, consider speaking with your physician or a qualified healthcare professional. Evidence-based smoking cessation programs, counseling, and appropriate medical support can significantly improve the chances of successfully quitting.
References
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). (2024). Health Effects of Vaping and E-cigarettes.
National Health Service (NHS). (2024). How to Stop Smoking and Quit Vaping.
World Health Organization. (2024). Tobacco and Electronic Cigarettes.
Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD). (2024). Health at a Glance 2024.
U.S. Surgeon General. (2020). Smoking Cessation: A Report of the Surgeon General.
